Gazing at the sky, half black to my right and clear white on my left. A light drizzle falls down, causing the hood of my black Nissan Rogue to shine. Trying to ensure that my two children receive a balance of activities, it is now, “outdoor time.”
The drizzle has stopped. I watch my daughter slightly, not wanting to allow her to notice, as she rides her bike in circles. The expression on her face is one that is trying to tell me that she doesn’t want to be outside; and if my eyes were to connect with hers I would probably see the forced tears fill them and roll down her cheeks.
My son is now out of my direct eyesight as I have allowed him to take his bike for a quick scroll around the neighborhood. Our home is positioned on a curve in the center of our circled community. Just as quickly as he rode away he returned. His curiosity of the outdoors and patterns of people, seems to push him to explore his surroundings. Although, the thought of the unknown, when a car drives by, a dog comes too close or a door slams too abruptly as he adventures through, sends him back home to the safe space of mom.
I remember there was a saying, “there’s no manual to being a parent.” Well now there are plenty. Ones that break down the brain of a child and others that even tell you what to expect from them. After completing, you can read another that teaches you how to respond in different “common” scenarios. Books ranging from pregnancy to adolescents are readily available to walk you through the steps of parenting designed to “guarantee” your success or at least help you through.
As I watch my children slowly walk their bikes close to the garage door, my son puts down the kickstand on his mountain bike, covered in blue and yellow stripes. While my daughter leans her pink and white character bike against the garage door. They walk to the sidewalk and take their positions, my son allowing his sister to go at least 20 steps ahead, before I hear, “On your mark, Get set, Go!” They begin to run, my son choosing to go at a slower pace, as my daughter runs full speed, with her plump cheeks moving with every step. For a six year old, she is pretty fast, (comparing her to no one). With a focused expression on her face, she reaches the designated ending point (a nearby streetlight) and yells, “I won!” As she oddly dances in victory. I then realize that nothing, I mean nothing, can replace these moments. The moments you are able to capture with your own eyes. The moments that are forever time stamped in your heart, that you can proudly say, “I was there!”
As the smell of the rain that once was, begin to fill my nostrils, I understand that books provide lots of knowledge, fancy words, a touch of reality and a sense of hope. Even with that, nothing replaces or prepares you for the true joy and love that comes from being a mother.
So embrace every moment, learn from every step, challenge yourself daily and laugh as often as possible. Your key to success is love. Give hugs and lots of kisses, receive them too, because you need them. Take a deep breath and live.
So I Simply Say... Mother, you are enough!